Itsy Bitsy
by juviass
Summary: And whenever they looked back, it was the little moments that they remembered. — Laxana


**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Fairy Tail.**

**Salutations, dear readers! This is for Mrs. HopeEsthiem's kind-of-somewhat-like-a writing contest. Anyone can join this writing contest, but make sure you PM _me_ first, since Mrs. HopeEsthiem is pretty busy on a daily basis. I'll give you more details once you PM me saying that you'd like to participate, but here are some basic guidelines:**

**Pairing: Laxus Dreyar x Cana Alberona**

**Due Date: The middle/end of April.**

**Prize: The winner will get a Fairy Tail couples one-shot of their choice, at least 3000 words.**

**So set those plot bunnies free from their cages, and start writing, people!  
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* * *

><p>"<strong>C<strong>an you stop?" an irritated Card Mage hissed as she whipped around to face her nuisance of a guildmate.

"Stop what?" Laxus asked innocently. He propped his chin on the palm of his hand and stared at her, and Cana glared back. Two seconds later, the brunette sighed and turned back around, then took and polished off her barrel of beer. She ignored the soft tug on the back of her bikini as she picked up the next barrel, but squeaked in surprise when Laxus tugged harder. She felt the front of her bikini fall, and quickly dropped the barrel and hugged her chest. Whoops and whistles filled the room.

"Laxus!" she shrieked, her face flushed from a mix of embarrassment and alcohol. The male simply smirked and hopped off the barstool, then waved at her as he sauntered out of the guild.

"Goddamnit, you jerk, get back here!"

* * *

><p>"...<strong>A<strong>nnoying."

"What was that?"

"I said you were annoying, you prat."

"Prat? Prat is equal to ass..."

"Oh god."

"And ass is equal to butts..."

"Laxus. Laxus stop. Please."

"And you know what I say about butts..."

"Don't do this, Laxus. Please don't."

"I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CANNOT LIE."

"Oh my _god_..."

"YOU OTHER BROTHERS CAN'T DENY..."

"Why does this happen to me?"

"THAT WHEN A GIRL WALKS IN WITH AN ITTY BITTY WAIST AND A ROUND THING IN YOUR FACE..."

"Just kill me already. I just want to die."

"YOU GET SPRUNG!"

* * *

><p>"<strong>N<strong>othing is more beautiful than you, my love," Laxus said seriously, dropping to one knee.

"What did you do this time, Mira?" Cana immediately hissed, whipping around to face the bartender.

Mirajane looked up at the brunette and gave her an innocent look. "I don't know. What _did_ I do?"

"You know what you did. Why the hell is this _idiot_—" she jerked her thumb at Laxus "—acting like Loke?"

"Nonsense!" Laxus shouted. "I'm much more gentlemanly than that flirt!"

The females ignored him. "Well, I might've _accidentally_ mixed a love potion into Laxus' drink, and I might've _accidentally_ told him to look your way," Mirajane said sweetly. Cana groaned.

"Ugh, I don't wanna deal with this guy pulling cheesy lines on me—" Cana suddenly stopped talking, and her face lit up as an ingenious idea struck her. "Hey, how long does this potion last, Mira?" she asked.

"About an hour. Why?"

"You'll see." The Card Mage hopped off her bar and ran out of the guild. She returned five minutes later with a Lacrima Camera and a face splitting grin.

"Now," she said, snickering evilly. "Let the fun begin..."

**_The Next Day..._**

"_...and I solemnly swear that you'll be the only woman in my heart, until death do us part!_"

Laxus started at the screen, eyes wide and jaw slack. "Oh my fucking god..."

Cana howled with laughter and slapped the Dragon Slayer's back. "And that's not even the best part! You wanna know what you did after? You kissed my hand!" Cana doubled over with another round of laughter, and Laxus buried his face in his hands, silently sobbing.

* * *

><p>"<strong>A<strong>m I hearing things?" Cana laughed nervously. "You're kidding, right? Did Mira give you a love potion again? Or are you just drunk?"

"I'm serious, Cana," said Laxus. He took a step forward, and she took a step back.

"You seemed pretty serious when Mira drugged you," the brunette pointed out, taking another step back when Laxus took another step forward.

"What I said back then was completely different than what I said just now." Two steps forward.

"It still means roughly the same thing." Two steps back. "How do I know that it wasn't just a milder version of the potion?"

"Because I haven't had anything to drink all night." He took a step forward, she a step back. He sighed in exasperation. "C'mon, Cana, why won't you believe me?"

"B-Because..." Cana muttered. She let out a small squeak when she felt her back hit the brick wall of the alley Laxus had backed her into, and cursed herself for drinking so much she actually _let_ herself go somewhere with Laxus.

"Because... What?" Laxus asked, keeping his voice low.

"Because... Because you're just Laxus!" she exclaimed quickly, but suddenly felt guilty when he gave her a hurt look. Damn it, that wasn't what she had meant to say... "L-Look, I need to go home. I have a job tomorrow and—"

The Card Mage flinched when Laxus slammed his hands on the walls on either side of her head and leaned down angrily.

"What did you mean by that?" Laxus growled, locking eyes with the brunette. His breath splayed hotly across her face.

"By what?" she asked innocently, never mind that her heart was thudding a million kilometres an hour, and her head was a jumble of thoughts and emotions.

"Don't play dumb with me, Cana," he snarled. "What did you mean when you said that I was '_just_ Laxus'?"

"I..." Suddenly feeling the intensity of his gaze, Cana's eyes fell, and her face flushed. There was a pause before the Dragon Slayer released a ragged breath.

"Fine. Just forget about what I said then, Cana. Go home," Laxus whispered harshly. He dropped his arms and turned around and began walking out of the alley.

"No, w-wait! Laxus, I—" And then suddenly she was running after him and tackling him to the floor and she was kissing him and he was kissing _back_ and it was all just _toomuchtoprocess_ and—

And then she felt him smirk against her lips, and she jerked away, her face red and her eyes wet and her mind searing with anger—

"Son of a bitch," she spat, sitting up sharply. "You tricked me. You fucking tricked—mmph!" Laxus leaned up and captured her lips with his own. He put a firm hand on the back of her neck to keep her from jerking away again, and put the other on top of one of her hands.

"You goddamn jerk," she hissed when they pulled away. "I'll kill you. I'll get _Gildartz_ to kill—" She stopped short when she felt him caress her hair, and because it was so sweet and gentle and so _un-Laxus-like_, she abruptly flared red. And then he chuckled and she slapped him and he chuckled again. "How did you know, anyways?" she asked.

"I saw you blush earlier," he said with a smirk. "That's what gave you away."

"Tch." Cana turned away from him in an attempt to hide her face.

"Yeah, just like that," Laxus said with a laugh. "Y'know, you're pretty damn cute when you do that, Cana."

"I hate you," she muttered, elbowing him in the ribs. This learned her a laugh and another kiss.

"And that's exactly why I like you, darling."

* * *

><p>"<strong>D<strong>amn you," Laxus hissed, his clenched fists shaking at his sides.

"Don't be a baby," Cana said with a snicker. "A bet's a bet. Now hurry up and do _that_."

Laxus snorted. "Absolutely _not_."

"Aww, c'mon. Why not?" Cana whined.

"Because I have _pride_."

"But you already have the ears on!" she pointed out. Laxus gave an indignant grunt.

"You put them on for me. It wasn't a _choice_."

"But you look so... so _cute_!"

Laxus growled. "Say I'm cute one more time and I swear I'll—"

"You'll what? You're too _cute_ to do anything to _uncu__tify _yourself, you _cutie_." Cana smirked when Laxus huffed and turned away from her. "C'mon, just one time?" she asked. "Forget about the bet. Do this for me, Laxus."

He flinched, and a grin tugged on the corners of her lips. "U-Urg..."

"If you do it, I promise I won't make you wear the tail."

Laxus whirled around to face her, a faint blush painting his cheeks. "You had a _tail_?"

"Of course," she said matter-of-factly. "And if you don't hurry up and _do it_, I won't hesitate to put it on you."

There were a few moments of silence, before Laxus sighed and gave in. "Fine..."

"Yes!" Cana cheered, doing a little victory dance.

The Dragon Slayer took a deep breath and temporarily shoved his pride to the side. His face reddened as he brushed one of the black cat ears on his head and said,

"N-Nyaa..."

* * *

><p>"<strong>R<strong>eally? Oh my god, that's hilarious!" Cana shrieked with laughter.

"He actually looked pretty good in the suit," Evergreen said with a smirk. "But he was walking so stiffly it was a wonder the guards didn't notice him. Not to mention he was holding the tray upside down." There was another round of laughter from the girls' corner of the room.

A few metres away, Laxus shot the women a confused glance. "What are they talking about?" he muttered to himself.

"My babies say that it's about _that_ mission," Bixlow said, sticking his tongue out.

"_That_ mission!" the dolls repeated.

"Yeah, _that_ mission!"

Bixlow snickered at the memory. "Y'know, the one where we had to crash a party and steal back some jewelry."

"The one where I had to pose as a prince?" Fried asked, and Bixlow nodded.

"I bet you anything they're talking about how Laxus had to be your but—"

"And then— oh my god this is so funny I can barely breathe, but— he got so pissed off he called the host of the party 'bastard' instead of 'master'!" Evergreen said through fits of laughter. "I wish you could've seen the looks on the faces of those rich snobs..."

"Ugh," Laxus groaned, slumping in his seat. "Why did I even tell you guys about me and Cana?"

"Because we're your bodyguards!" Fried said pridefully. "We're your closest—"

"No, no, no, that's nothing compared to when Laxus was drugged with a love potion," came Cana's loud voice.

"WHAT." Laxus shot up from his seat and stormed over to the other side of the room.

"—and we've gone through so many ordeals together—" Fried weeped, continuing with his rant about being Laxus' bodyguards.

"Do you know what he called me? Oh man, I almost dropped the LacrimaCam at this part, but—"

"You had _pictures_?" Evergreen asked incredulously.

"Even better, I've got videos," said Cana with a smirk. "So anyways, after he took my hand, he called me 'My La'— mmph!"

"—just so _touching_—" Bixlow whacked the green haired Mage, who hissed in annoyance. "What do you _want_, Bix... Oh."

All heads in the room were turned to where Laxus had pushed the brunette down and kissed her, ceasing all speech and movement.

"Watch your tongue, _darling_," he snarled in her ear when he pulled away, "or I might just let _your_ experience with love potions leak into the guild. Now be a good girl and _shush_." He licked her earlobe slowly before he got off of her with a smirk.

"You wouldn't dare..." Cana said slowly as she sat up again.

"Try me," Laxus said before sweeping past the Raijinshuu members. "Let's go." Bixlow and Evergreen exchanged sighs and shrugs before following him, while Fried glanced from Laxus to Cana.

"B-But what about—" he started, but was quickly cut off by Laxus.

"She knows I'll be back for her," Laxus said with a smug grin. "And she knows what'll happen if she leaves, doesn't she?"

"W-Weren't you supposed to be leaving?" Cana hissed, growing redder by the second. Laxus laughed and sauntered out of the room, while Fried looked at her in confusion before leaving, too.

* * *

><p>"<strong>E<strong>nough!" Cana bellowed at the bickering Raijinshuu members. "If you shitheads want to be useful to Laxus, just shut the hell up and leave!"

"That's being useful to you, not Laxus," Bixlow said with a smirk, pausing his argument with Fried. His "babies" repeated his words.

"Yeah!"

"Not Laxus!"

"Do you _want_ me to kill you?" Cana threatened. Bixlow laughed.

"I'd like to see you try, baby." The two engaged in a glaring (although in Bixlow's case, no one could really tell) war, before Cana sighed.

"Whatever," she hissed, then turned to her boyfriend. "Why can't you just tell them to leave?"

"Because they're irritating you, and it's hilarious," said Laxus.

"Fuck you," she muttered.

"Not without a price," he smirked suggestively.

"Tch. If no one else, at least tell Bixlow to leave. Please?"

Laxus sighed, but stood from his spot on the bed. "Alright you guys, go home. It's getting late."

"It's five past noon," Bixlow said, wagging his tongue.

"You know what I mean," the blond hissed. "I'll deal with you guys after Cana passes out again."

"Who says I'm gonna pass out?" the brunette challenged.

"You will after I'm done with you," Laxus said with a smirk.

"Tch." There was the sound of rustling blankets as Cana pulled them up higher, and Laxus chuckled.

"Let's go, you two," said Evergreen, startling them all. The sandy haired woman hadn't spoken since she greeted Cana and Laxus when the Raijinshuu arrived, and had spent the entire thirty minutes in a corner by herself. The males in the room had been suspicious, but none bothered to ask about what was up.

"Is there something wrong, Evergreen?" Fried finally asked. "You _never_ want to leave, and you've been silent the whole time."

"Nothing's wr—"

"_I LOVE YOU, MY LADY__!_" a familiar voice declared. Evergreen shrieked and yanked a pair of earbuds from her ears before bursting out into a laughing fit, and Laxus paled, finally figuring out why she had been so quiet.

"GET OUT!" the Dragon Slayer roared, and the Raijinshuu members hastily left the room.

"Hey, was that...?" Bixlow asked with a snicker.

"Yep. Wanna watch?" Evergreen offered, and there was a loud "Hell yeah!" before the door was slammed shut by a fuming Laxus.

"Quiet down!" Cana groaned, curling up into a ball. "Girl with a hangover here!"

"You said you destroyed the lacrima!" Laxus snarled, suddenly by the bed again, and Cana pulled the covers down just enough that her head was showing again, and shifted so that her back was to the wall.

"Are you kidding? That's valuable blackmail material!" Cana said. "And besides, it's revenge for embarrassing me in front of them last time."

Laxus pressed his lips onto hers roughly and scraped her lower lips with his teeth before pulling away. "And _that_ was revenge for your revenge."

"If that's what you call revenge, you suck at it," Cana chuckled, and Laxus rolled his eyes before kissing her again. But when he pulled away this time, she felt something cold on her neck. She lifted it up to inspect it, and then gave a small laugh.

"You're supposed to give your hungover girlfriend _food_, not a necklace."

"Mm, but it was nice," he said as he toyed with her hair, which was splayed across the pillow. "And I had the charm modified so that it acts like a shock absorber. Just in case some other lightning hotshot decides he can take you. Not that I'd let them," he added, watching her run her thumb over the little lightning bolt lacrima on the end of the chain. "I was going to give it to you yesterday, but you were so drunk you were trying to seduce Romeo."

"Shut up," she muttered, eyes still fixed on the charm. Noticing it, Laxus smiled.

"Like it?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said, letting go of the charm so that she could prop herself up on her elbows to kiss the blond. "Thanks, Laxus."

"Mm. Happy Birthday, Cana."

"Heh," Cana mumbled to herself. "So even _you_ can be romantic."

"What?"

"Nothing," she said, leaning up to kiss him again. "I love you, Laxus."

"Yeah," he murmured against her lips. "Me too."

* * *

><p>"<strong>Y<strong>es! Laxus!" Cana screamed as she reached her climax, and Laxus groaned and came when he felt her clench around him. Spent, the male pulled out and collapsed beside her, who was still trying to catch her breath.

"Cana," he said between breaths. The brunette glanced his way.

"Hm?"

"I love you," he said, and Cana chuckled.

"That's the first time you've ever said that to me," she told him, feeling for his hand and twining their fingers together. "If you don't count the time you were on the love potion, that is." She giggled when his face darkened, and then rolled on top of him and kissed him. Her necklace scratched the Dragon Slayer's chest.

"I love you, too," she said. "Ready for round three?"

Laxus smirked and flipped their positions so that he was on top of her again. "Do you even need to ask?"

* * *

><p>"<strong>A<strong>h... What?"

"I cannot believe you did that," Laxus groaned, slumping in his seat. "I knew putting it in your drink was a stupid idea."

"I..."

"Seriously, how do you _not_ notice when something like that is in your mouth? There were diamonds on it, too! Didn't you feel it when you swallowed it?"

"I... swallowed it?" Cana repeated slowly, too shocked to know how to react.

"Do _you_ see a ring in your glass? I don't, so yes, you swallowed it."

"Oh my god."

Laxus sighed. "Where am I gonna get another one of those? The band was made of lightning charged lacrima!"

"Oh my god. I swallowed the ring. Oh my god. I'm so sorry, Laxus," Cana said, her voice quivering.

"C-Cana?"

"I'm so sorry, Laxus!" the brunette cried, and Laxus could see tears forming at the corners of her eyes. "I'm sorry! I didn't notice, and I don't know why I didn't, but I'm so sorry—"

The blond pulled her into a hug. "It's okay. If anyone should be sorry, it should be me."

"What? But it was my fault—"

"No, it wasn't. You didn't do anything wrong, because I've got the ring right here," said Laxus, holding up a small purple box. Cana's eyes widened and she jerked away just in time to see him open the box to reveal a small, golden ring with diamonds embedded in it.

"I was only going to scare you a little," he said with a sheepish look. "Just for fun, y'know? I didn't think you'd actually _cry_—"

"You jerk!" Cana screamed, slapping the Dragon Slayer across the face.

"I deserved that," he admitted.

"Damn right you did!" she seethed. Her whole body was shaking. "You seriously scared me, Laxus! I really thought that I swallowed the ring. I thought I had just completely ruined the chance of us having a future together, and—"

"I know, I know," Laxus said, pulling the Card Mage into another hug and stroking her back soothingly. She gripped the back of his jacket tightly. "I know, and I'm sorry. That was mean of me. I should've just proposed normally, so I'll do it right now."

Laxus let go and took a step back, then went down on one knee. He looked up at her with a somewhat softer version of his trademark smirk. "I love you, Cana. Will you marry me?"

Cana wiped her arm across her eyes. "I hate you," she said, but there was a small smile on her lips. "You scared the shit out of me, Laxus."

"I know, and I feel horrible for doing it," Laxus said sincerely.

"Horrible enough to foot the bill for all the booze I'm going to drink tomorrow night?" she asked, and Laxus cringed. The last time he had footed her bill, he had to go on two S-Class jobs to get the money back. But...

"Yes," Laxus sighed. "I'll even pay for new clothes to replace the ones you'll throw up on tomorrow night."

"How nice," Cana laughed, hopping off the barstool. She crouched and kissed him with a smile. "Of course I'll marry you, Laxus," she said as he stood up with her. "Just make sure there's booze during the party.

"I wouldn't dream of leaving it out," Laxus chuckled, kissing her again. "I love you, Cana," he said again.

"I love you, too, Laxus."

* * *

><p>"<strong>R<strong>eady?" Gildartz asked, holding out his arm stiffly.

"Loosen up, pops. I'm the one getting married here, not you," Cana said with a laugh.

"Sure, but all kinds of things could go wrong! You could trip on your dress! Natsu could burn the guild down! Hell, Acnologia could come swooping down and—"

"Calm down, we already know that Natsu's probably going to burn the guild down anyways," Cana said. She took Gildartz's arm and guided him to the door. "And besides, even if Acnologia _did_ crash the wedding, you'd be there to protect me, wouldn't you?'

Gildartz was momentarily stunned, before he let out a small laugh. "If anything, _your husband_ should be the one to protect you. In fact, I'd give the brat a beating if he _didn't_ protect you." Cana laughed, and Gildartz leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. "I'm so happy for you, Cana," he murmured, and the brunette grinned.

"I know you are, father. Now c'mon, let's go." She tugged on his arm, and Gildartz chuckled and followed, a big, goofy grin plastered on his face the whole time he was walking down the isle.

_Cana Dreyar, huh?_ he thought with a smile.

_That didn't sound too bad._

* * *

><p><strong>For you, Panda. I hope I satisfied your Laxana cravings. I'm sorry I couldn't resist the pull of the Crack Side. They were offering me cookies!<br>**

**For anyone that _isn't_ Mrs. HopeEsthiem, I hope you enjoyed my first Laxana fic! I apologize if the characters are a little OOC. I'm not used to writing with Laxus, and it was hard finding the soft side to his personality in the manga, since he already doesn't show up much.**

**I have no explanation as to why Laxus was singing Baby Got Back. I really don't. It just... I don't even know.  
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**Kudos to anyone who caught onto the _thing_ I was doing in the story!  
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**Thanks for reading!  
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